blame the hormones?
May 16, 2007
it’s rare that i feel like a child of divorce.
it’s rare that i get angry at my dad for what happened.
it’s rare that i think mean things about my step-mom or resent my step sisters for the time they spend with my dad.
i felt and did all those rare things today.
us kennedys have complicated relationships with each other; it’s the course of history. fights and reunions, years of silence, insults said close enough behind your back that you know they were meant to be heard…it’s the way of things. this behaviour fortunately doesn’t translate to relationships with other non-family people but it’s intense amongst us fiery kennedys.
anyways, the fieryest of us all-my aunt anne-is in edmonton for a few days from germany before she and my dad and step mom head off to n. caroline to meet my uncle and go to hilton head in s. carolina.
my aunt is a mean mean lady. she’s an alcoholic and shares her opinions about EVERYTHING (including whether or not she thinks you’re too fat) as liberally as she drinks. but last year something changed: my cousin was killed in a car accident and she lost her baby son. his death reminded all us mean kennedys that family is the most important thing we have and we have to cherish it. so i want to spend time with her, get to know her, forget all the bad stuff and know her all over again…
anyways, i am not getting into details but in typical kennedy fashion the shit has hit the fan and the usual course of action is being pursued on all counts, myself included, and i am really upset about the whole thing.
fuck!
sigh.
maybe it’s my period making me more “sensitive” but i refuse to blame hormones and allow them to get my dad off the hook for being a complete asshole. so there!
ape fucking woman
May 10, 2007
so i like to look at my blog stats sometimes. just out of curiosity…
one thing wordpress will tell you is what search terms were entered that somehow display my blog.
apparently the following have been popular search engine terms:
| tim armstrong | 2 |
| Josh Homme tattoo | 1 |
| sexual interoffice emails | 1 |
| brandon boyd art | 1 |
when i look at the stats it also says “ape fucking woman-1″ it doesn’t show up in copy and paste. i have no idea why. there was also something about josh homme groupies too…who knows…
hilarious. ape fucking woman=inter-office dance party. glad to know what the internet thinks i do with my spare time.
ha ha.
m.
so friends, it’s that time of the year again.
it’s time to tally up all my neurotic spreadsheets and tell you all how much richer i’d be if i was indifferent to record stores and seedy bars.
the totals are actually smaller than last year’s but it’s still an impressive feat. the compilation, not the spending; everyone can spend money…
*please note the math is probably off in a lot of places. i suck at math.
*can i also just say this is fun for me. it has no meaning beyond my own curiosity. don’t assume it to be more than it is. thanks.
the numbers:
the record fetish:
total cds purchased: 94
total records purchased: 16
emusic: 75 songs/month X 12 months= 375 songs; approx. 12 songs/album= approx 31.25 albums
gifts: 7
grand total: 148.25
total costs: $1928.46
emusic: $120.15
gift certificates: $134.71
cd total: $1427.06 (74% of total)
vinyl total: $212.13 (11%)
gifts: $96.42
smallest puchase: $7.00 (merch)
largest: $101.07 (blackbyrd)
monthly:
(*an additonal $23.08 was added since dec. to represent emusic subscription)
may 06: $63.80, june 06: 126.81, july 06: $235.62, aug 06: $155.74, sept 06: $150.40, oct 06: $52.97 (but there were two purchases marked $0.00 and i am sure neither megatunes nor blackbyrd gave me free cds…), nov 06: 183.71, dec 06: $411.68 (WHOA!), jan 07: $94.16, feb 07: $89.91, mar 07: 133.01, april 07: $307.69, may 07 (to-date): $28.14.
average # of albums/month: 12.35, average $ amount/month: 160.70
i went record shopping 44 times which is every 1.18 weeks and each time i bought approx. 3.37 albums.
i spent:
at blackbyrd: $732.53 (38%) and bought 46 albums (31%)
a megatunes: $99.58 (5%) and bought 9 albums (6%)
hmv: $674.99 (35%), 36 (24%)
a & b sound: 0. (odd)
listen records: $66.83 (3%), 5 (3%)
other (merch, internets, etc…): $354.31 (18%), 50.25 (33%)
the scenester:
before i lay out the numbers for how many shows i went to i have to say that the number seems low and that i am SURE i definately forgot a few…
total shows: 42
total bands seen: 112 (approx)
average bands per show: 2.66
i went to a show approx. every 1.24weeks.
total amount: $477.75
average cost per show: $11.38
most expensive: $46.50 (social distortion at reds/eds/ecc)
cheapest: there were many $5.00 shows.
free shows: 7 (17%)
by venue:
sidetrack: $18.00 (3.8%), 3 shows (7%); starlite: $93.25 (20%), 8 (19%); victory/velvet: $28.00 (6%), 4 (10%) (this is where it’s weird-i feel like i was a lot more than 4 shows at the victory lounge); reds: $86.50 (18%), 2 (5%); powerplant: $28.00 (6%), 3 (7%); rexall: $0.00, 2 (5%)-these were big shows my dad payed for….tee hee; new city: $25.00 (5.2%), 3 (7%); other (kHz, dinwoodie, jubilee, halls, etc…): $192.00 (40%), 17 (40%)
by month:
may 06: $18.00 (4%), 3 (7%); june 06: $113.00 (24%), 6 (14%); july 06: $27.50 (6%), 2 (5%); aug 06: $15.00 (3%), 3 (7%); sept 06: $63.00 (13%), 6 (14%); oct o6: $18.00 (4%), 1 (2%); nov 06: $17.00 (4%), 3 (7%); dec 06: $40.00 (8%), 2 (5%); jan 07: $35.00 (7%), 3 (7%); feb 07: $10.00 (2%), 2 (5%); mar 07: $29.75 (6%), 4 (10%); april 07: $69.50 (15%), 5 (11%); may 07 (to-date): $17.00 (4%), 2 (5%).
SUPER DUPER GRAND HUGE TOTALS!!
TOTAL TOTAL: $2406.21
monthly: may 06: $81.80, june 06: $239.81, july 06: $263.12, aug 06: $170.74, sept 06: $213.40, oct 06: $70.97, nov 06: $200.71, dec 06: $451.68, jan 07: $129.16, feb 07: $99.91, mar 07: $162.76, april 07: $377.19, may 07 (to date): $45.14.
monthly average: $200.52
so there you have it friends. a drug habit would be more, right?
i have a theory.
May 4, 2007
truthfully, i have millions of theories. like millions.
this new theory was developed this morning while driving to work in the pouring rain and listening to shitty mainstream rock radio. in one particular set of three “modern” rock hits shitty sonic played incubus, billy talent, and queens of the stone age and the only i song i found myself really enjoying (despite the fact that i don’t particularly enjoy it…) is the queens of the stone age song…
and then i figured out why.
when rock and roll became the shit it was all about sex. (and drugs…but mostly sex) elvis was evil because he shook his hips in a way that indicated sexual behaviour and people went bananas for it. like BANANAS! bananas. today rock and roll lacks sex. you listen to these bands and regardless of how techinically able they are they are so sex-less that it feels impossible to imagine them fucking groupies and living that lifestyle that. no matter how antiquated, we will always associate with rock and roll. i don’t know about you but for as hot as he may or may not be i can’t imagine brandon boyd* fucking a groupie. i just can’t. he probably goes home to his wife and does yoga and then has tantric sex. which is awesome but it’s not very rock ‘n roll. now think about josh homme -josh homme fucks groupies. he may be married, he may be way LESS slutty than brandon boyd…i don’t care. how people ARE isn’t important in rock; how people SEEM is all that matters. rock and roll that lacks sex is boring.
mainstream rock music is 80% boring because 80% of it lacks sex. part of the 20% that’s ok is usually ok because it’s all full of sex (DFA 1979-HELLO?! who doesn’t want to fuck to that?!) or because it’s utterly ridiculous/theatrical.
to be clear i am talking ONLY about straight up rock music. NO PREFIXS. post-, punk-, folk-, indie-, neo-post-, etc…all have their own iconography that makes them rad or crap depending on your perspective…
i suppose this could be further extended to a semiotic argument^ of what we as a culture deem to be the codified signs of rock and roll but saussure is long dead and nothing kills a rock ’n roll hard on like semiotics.
or maybe i just did a semiotic reading… eco would argue that i did.
check it:
from wiki:”Umberto Eco['s]…most important contributions to the field bear on interpretation, encyclopedia, and model reader. He has also criticized in several works (A theory of semiotics, La struttura assente, Le signe, La production de signes) the “iconism” or “iconic signs” (taken from Peirce’s most famous triadic relation, based on indexes, icons, and symbols), to which he purposes four modes of sign production: recognition, ostentation, replica, and invention.”
yep!
discuss friends, what do you think. is part of what makes modern rock so boring is a lack of sex? DISCUSS!
xo m.
*seriously, look at the picture. pirates are sexy and it looks like someone just plunked that down on his head and he could give a shit less about what it does to him. it’s like he was just, “what? i like surfing and picking my nose-let’s go do yoga!” he doesn’t care enough to make that photo awesome.
^i wrote a pretty huge paper on the semiotics of punk rock as it relates to appropriation and commodification. i’m a nerd.
about a month ago eli, myself, and the rest of the internets were talking about that scene in “another state of mind” when an 18 yr old mike ness is standing alone at a mirror before a show putting on eyeliner. a defining moment in punk rock to some…
last week i saw social disortion for the first time ever and looking at mike ness not more than 4 feet away from me, sweat and eye liner pouring down his face i imagine very little of that ritual has changed. an 18 yr old mike ness still puts on eyeliner before every show. an 18 yr old mike ness is still the one on that stage defining what music should be 25 years later… think about it friends, were it not for mike ness then billy joe armstrong may never have picked up that coal pencil and become a superstar…
i digress.
first let me tell you, as much as i LOVE social distortion as a band i love mike ness like a woman loves a hot hot hot man. whenever him and his gorgeous gold guitar would get within those precious 4 feet of me i couldn’t help but bite my lip just a little. it was either that or get kicked out of reds for inappropriate behaviour (WINK WINK).
anyways.
it’s taken me a week to fully wrap my head around what i’ve seen and i still can’t. i know that sounds dumb but social distortion is one of those bands for me. one of those bands that will always be important because of the time in my life they capture or how regardless of how old we all become we’ll still have this relationship. the songs will always be amazing. mike ness with always be a rockstar and social distortion will always be the band that reminds me how much i still do love punk rock despite how silly it seems most of the time. some of those songs are older than me and they’re still ALL so good!
i wish i was a better writer so i could describe what it felt like to be in that shitty mall and totally taken away from my entire life for 2 hours. gone were the sweaty kids pushing and head butting all around me, gone was the constant reminded of how obnoxious going to shows really can be, gone were the constant reminders that i was actually inside the largest edifice to capitalism in the western hemisphere and all that remained was me and 15 or so timeless songs that mean the world to me.
anyways,
much love!
michelle.
p.s. sorry ’bout all the links. i am insanely bored at work today!
